Marriage and babies...

There is nothing I want more at this time in my life than to get married and have another baby... BUT I can't do that on my own. My boyfriend, of 9 years, has a phobia I think. Every once in awhile I get my hopes up and then get depressed. So I just don't care anymore.

Recently I've been nagged and nagged and nagged about when we are having another. Well guess what. NOT NOW! We have a beautiful 5 year old boy. We love each other and after being together for 9 years, it necessary.

Yes I want to marry this man. Yes I want more kids with this man. I am only 27 years old. I still have time. I'm just getting really really REALLY tired of people asking. SO STOP ASKING!!! Or teasing. Just cause everyone else (ok, not everyone) has a perfect life. Marriage, then kids, blah blah blah!

So then my family is being retarded. My mom has pretty much made it clear that her husbands kids are more important. WHATEVER! Can't stand her husband! They've talked about moving out here and I DO NOT want it to happen. I can't handle them that close. Yes I love my mom. Yes I would like to see her more than once every 2 years. But NO I do not want her close enough to show up for coffee. I've told I don't know how many times how much I'd like them to come for a visit. Or for her to come. She doesn't work. But she won't come without HIM. There is always some excuse.

My dad was MIA for 4 days. He apparently forgot to pay his phone bill. It makes me so mad. Why the hell can't you afford to pay a $50 phone bill. Too many drugs? Too much alcohol? I just don't get it. He was supposed to call me... that was on monday....its now thursday and no phone call...

I'm just SO frustrated with everyone! Leave me alone! seriously!
I'm at the point where I don't want to answer the phone. I don't want to be around anyone. I want to take my son and run away from everyone that I know or am related too.


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